How to Make Good Habits Stick and Break Bad Habits for Good

We’ve all been there. You decide to make a change. Maybe it’s waking up earlier, starting to exercise, drinking more water, or stopping that bad habit you’ve been wrestling with for years (yes, I’m talking about those late-night snack binges!).

You start strong, full of enthusiasm, but soon enough, the motivation fizzles. The bad habits creep back, and those good intentions? Poof, gone.

The truth is, creating good habits that last and breaking bad ones for good isn’t about willpower or sheer determination. It’s about understanding the psychology of habits, setting yourself up for success, and taking the right small steps that will snowball over time.

But don’t worry—whether you want to start meditating every morning or finally quit smoking, this guide will walk you through every stage of the process.

We’ll dive deep into the strategies you need, based on science, psychology, and practical advice that works.

1. The Science Behind Habits: Why Are They So Powerful?

Before we get to the how, let’s explore the why. Why do habits, both good and bad, have such a tight grip on our lives? It all comes down to the brain’s incredible efficiency.

Our brains are hardwired to form habits because they save energy. According to research, up to 40% of our daily actions are driven by habits rather than conscious decisions. That’s almost half of your day running on autopilot!

Let’s break down how habits form at a neurological level.

The Habit Loop

Charles Duhigg, in his book The Power of Habit, explains how habits work in a simple cycle known as the cue-routine-reward loop:

1. Cue: This is the trigger that sets the habit into motion. It could be an emotion (feeling stressed), a time of day (2 PM coffee craving), or a specific environment (seeing your couch might make you want to sit and binge Netflix).
2. Routine: The habit itself—the action or behavior you perform. This could be something like grabbing a sugary snack, scrolling endlessly on your phone, or going for a jog.
3. Reward: This is what reinforces the habit, making you want to repeat it next time the cue appears. The reward could be tangible (like sugar from that snack) or emotional (the relief you feel after procrastinating).

When your brain recognizes that a particular routine provides a reward, it starts to associate the cue with that reward. Over time, your brain begins craving the reward as soon as it encounters the cue, driving you to perform the behavior automatically.

Brain Plasticity and Habit Formation

Your brain actually rewires itself to make these behaviors easier and more automatic. This process is called neuroplasticity, and it’s what allows habits to form.

With enough repetition, neural pathways are strengthened, making the behavior more likely to happen without much thought.

But here’s the kicker: your brain doesn’t care if the habit is good or bad. As long as it leads to a reward, your brain is happy to keep the cycle going.

That’s why breaking bad habits and forming new, healthier ones can be so challenging. Your brain has already established a routine, and changing it takes conscious effort and time.

The 21-Day Myth: How Long Does It Really Take to Form a Habit?

You’ve probably heard that it takes 21 days to form a habit. This idea became popular after Dr. Maxwell Maltz mentioned it in his 1960s book Psycho-Cybernetics. But here’s the thing: it’s a myth.

Recent research from University College London found that, on average, it takes 66 days to form a new habit. And this can vary widely depending on the complexity of the habit.

Some people may form habits in just 18 days, while others might take over 200!

So, what’s the takeaway here? Consistency is more important than speed! You can’t rush the process, but by sticking with it long enough, you will eventually establish lasting habits.

2. Making Good Habits Stick

2.1. Start Small—Really Small

Let’s get real: most people fail at creating new habits because they start too big. You set a goal like, “I’m going to start running 5 miles every morning,” or “I’m going to meditate for 30 minutes every day.”

For the first few days, you’re pumped. But soon enough, life happens, and you realize that running 5 miles takes a lot of time and energy, or that sitting quietly for 30 minutes feels like an eternity.

So here’s a secret that makes all the difference: start small—so small that it feels ridiculously easy!

BJ Fogg, a behavioral scientist at Stanford University, introduced the concept of Tiny Habits, where he suggests shrinking new habits down to something so small it seems almost laughable.

Want to start flossing regularly? Commit to flossing just one tooth. Want to meditate? Start with just 60 seconds.

The idea is that when a habit is small, it’s hard to fail. You’ll likely think, “I can floss one tooth,” or “I can meditate for one minute,” and then you’ll naturally start doing more.

It’s called the snowball effect—small wins lead to bigger successes over time.

Research Support: A study published in The European Journal of Social Psychology found that simple, repeatable actions are the ones most likely to become automatic. When you focus on small, achievable habits, your brain gets used to the behavior faster and is more likely to maintain it in the long term.

2.2. Focus on Consistency, Not Perfection

It’s easy to get trapped in the all-or-nothing mentality. You miss a single day of working out, and suddenly, you think you’ve ruined everything, so you skip the next day too. Eventually, you throw in the towel. We’ve all done it!

But here’s what you need to remember: consistency beats perfection every single time. James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, advises that the real key to lasting habit change is showing up regularly—even if you’re not doing it perfectly.

Let’s say your goal is to exercise 30 minutes every day. If you miss one day, that’s fine. Just make sure you don’t miss two in a row.

Missing once is just life; missing twice can lead to a new habit—one you don’t want. The goal is to focus on progress, not perfection.

A great way to visualize this is with a simple rule: never miss twice. If you slip up once, no biggie. But make it a priority to get back on track immediately the next day. This ensures that small setbacks don’t derail your progress completely.

Research Support: According to research from the University of Scranton, 92% of people fail to keep their New Year’s resolutions, largely because they aim for perfection instead of focusing on consistency.

Those who focus on small, consistent steps rather than grand, perfect resolutions are more likely to succeed!

2.3. Stack Your Habits

What if I told you that one of the easiest ways to create a new habit is to attach it to something you already do? This is where habit stacking comes in, a concept popularized by James Clear in Atomic Habits.

Here’s how it works: Think about the habits you already perform every single day without fail. Maybe it’s making coffee in the morning, brushing your teeth, or commuting to work.

These are automatic routines that don’t require much thought. Now, pair your new habit with one of these established ones.

For example:

• After I pour my morning coffee, I’ll meditate for 1 minute.
• After I brush my teeth, I’ll write down one thing I’m grateful for.
• After I sit down at my desk, I’ll write 100 words for my blog.

By anchoring your new habit to an existing one, you create a natural cue that triggers the desired behavior. This makes it easier to remember and reinforces the habit faster because it piggybacks on something you’re already doing.

Research Support: A study conducted by the University of Southern California found that habit stacking can significantly improve the likelihood of sticking with new behaviors.

The study showed that pairing a new behavior with an existing routine increased habit retention by nearly 40%.

2.4. Design Your Environment for Success

If you’re relying purely on willpower to build new habits, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Willpower is a limited resource, and research shows that it depletes as you make decisions throughout the day.

Instead of relying on sheer grit, set up your environment to make the good habits easier and the bad habits harder.

Psychologist Kurt Lewin famously said, “Behavior is a function of a person and their environment.” The easier a habit is, the more likely you are to stick with it.

Let’s look at some examples:

• Want to drink more water? Leave a water bottle on your desk so it’s always in reach.
• Trying to eat healthier? Stock your fridge with pre-cut veggies, fruits, and healthy snacks so you don’t have to think about it.
• Want to exercise in the morning? Lay out your workout clothes the night before, so you’re ready to go as soon as you wake up.

By designing your environment in ways that support your goals, you make it almost effortless to engage in the new behavior.

The easier it is to perform the habit, the more likely you are to repeat it!

Research Support: A study published in Health Psychology found that participants who designed their environment to support a new behavior (like leaving workout gear visible) were significantly more likely to engage in the behavior consistently over time compared to those who relied on willpower alone.

3. Breaking Bad Habits for Good

Now that you have the blueprint for building good habits, let’s tackle the tricky part—breaking bad habits.

Bad habits are often deeply ingrained, and they can feel impossible to shake. But it’s not as hopeless as it seems.

3.1. Identify Your Habit Triggers

Remember the habit loop we talked about earlier (cue-routine-reward)? Well, breaking a bad habit starts with identifying the cue—what triggers the behavior.

Once you know the cue, you can work on changing the routine that follows.

For example, let’s say your bad habit is stress eating. Every time you feel stressed, you reach for snacks. In this case, stress is your cue. Your routine is eating, and your reward is the temporary comfort or relief from stress.

To break the habit, you first need to recognize the cues that lead to the behavior. It might help to keep a habit journal where you track when and why the bad habit occurs.

This could reveal patterns like:

• Feeling bored at 4 PM and reaching for social media.
• Getting anxious after a meeting and grabbing a sugary snack.
• Watching TV and automatically opening a bag of chips.

Once you know your cues, you can plan alternative routines that satisfy the same need without the negative behavior. For example, instead of stress-eating, you might try taking a short walk or practicing deep breathing exercises to relieve stress.

Research Support: A study from Duke University found that breaking bad habits requires disrupting the automatic response to cues. By identifying and altering triggers, you can effectively change their behavior.

3.2. Replace, Don’t Eliminate

Here’s a key insight: It’s much easier to replace a bad habit than to eliminate it altogether. Why? Because habits are deeply embedded in your brain’s reward system.

If you try to quit cold turkey without replacing the behavior, you’re leaving a void where that old habit used to be, and you’ll likely revert back to it when you’re stressed or tired.

The key is to find a healthier substitute that provides a similar reward. For example:

• If you’re trying to quit smoking, you might replace cigarettes with chewing gum or a stress ball to keep your hands busy.
• If you want to stop watching TV before bed, replace it with reading or listening to a podcast.
• If you’re trying to cut down on snacking, replace chips with healthier alternatives like nuts or fruits.

Research Support: In a study conducted by the Journal of Consumer Research, participants who replaced a bad habit with a positive alternative were significantly more successful at breaking the habit than those who attempted to eliminate the behavior without substitution.

3.3. Make It Hard to Do

Bad habits stick because they’re often the easy choice. They require minimal effort, and the reward is immediate (even if it’s not good for you in the long term).

So, to break a bad habit, you need to flip the script: make it harder to do.

For example:

• If you’re trying to stop using social media, delete the apps from your phone. This adds a layer of friction, making it less convenient to access them.
• If you want to quit junk food, don’t keep it in the house. If you have to drive to the store every time you crave a snack, you’ll be less likely to indulge.
• If you tend to waste time watching TV, unplug the TV or hide the remote. The extra step of setting it up might deter you from mindlessly turning it on.

The goal is to introduce friction to the bad habit so that your brain starts associating it with more effort than it’s worth.

Research Support: A study published in Psychological Science found that increasing the effort required to perform a bad habit significantly reduced its frequency.

By adding friction to the process, participants were less likely to engage in automatic, unhealthy behaviors.

4. Stay Motivated and Track Your Progress

Building new habits and breaking old ones is a marathon, not a sprint. To stay on track, it’s essential to maintain motivation and celebrate small victories along the way.

4.1. Track Your Progress

One of the most effective ways to stick with new habits is by tracking your progress. When you see visible evidence of your efforts, you feel a sense of accomplishment, which reinforces the behavior.

This is where the power of habit tracking comes in.

You can use a simple paper calendar or a habit-tracking app like Habitica or Streaks. Every day you complete the habit, mark it off. Seeing that string of completed days grow is incredibly satisfying and will motivate you to keep going.

4.2. The “Don’t Break the Chain” Method

This popular method, often attributed to comedian Jerry Seinfeld, involves building a streak of days where you consistently follow through on your habit.

Each day you complete the habit, you mark an X on the calendar. Over time, you create a chain of Xs—and the goal is simple: don’t break the chain.

The longer your streak gets, the more motivated you’ll feel to keep it going. It becomes a game, where your brain craves the reward of seeing that unbroken chain!

4.3. Pairing Rewards with Habits

Sometimes, the reward isn’t obvious or immediate, especially for habits like exercise or saving money. That’s where pairing rewards can help.

By associating your habit with something enjoyable, you make it more enticing. For example:

• Exercise: Pair your workout with a podcast you love, or allow yourself a guilt-free Netflix episode afterward.
• Studying or working: Give yourself a 10-minute break to play a quick game or enjoy a snack once you’ve completed an hour of focused work.

This creates a positive association with the habit, making it easier to stick with in the long run.

4.4. Visual Reminders

Out of sight, out of mind—that’s how many habits die. But visual reminders can be incredibly powerful in keeping your goals front and center.

Whether it’s placing sticky notes around your house, setting up alerts on your phone, or leaving a note on your fridge, reminders help keep your new habits top of mind.

For example:

• If you’re trying to drink more water, leave water bottles where you can see them throughout your home.
• If you’re trying to meditate, put a reminder on your bathroom mirror so you see it every morning.

The more you see it, the harder it will be to forget!

5. Troubleshooting: What to Do When Habits Don’t Stick

Okay, so you’ve been working hard, but sometimes habits just don’t seem to stick as easily as you’d like. Don’t get discouraged!

Here’s how to troubleshoot and course-correct when things aren’t going as planned.

5.1. Reassess the Habit

First, take a step back and reassess the habit you’re trying to build. Is it realistic? Sometimes, we get overly ambitious and set goals that are too big or too time-consuming, which can lead to burnout or failure.

Ask yourself:

• Is this something I genuinely want to do, or do I feel obligated to do it?
• Can I break this habit down into smaller, more manageable steps?

You might need to scale it back a bit or find a way to make the habit more enjoyable.

5.2. Check Your Environment

Is your environment still supporting your goals? Sometimes, small changes to your surroundings can make a big difference. For example:

• If you’re trying to write every morning but your workspace is cluttered, it may be time to organize it.
• If you’re trying to eat healthier but your kitchen is filled with junk food, that’s an obstacle you can easily remove.

Rearranging your environment to better align with your goals can give you a fresh start and renewed motivation.

5.3. Adjust the Scale

If you find yourself constantly failing to keep up with a habit, it might be time to scale back. And that’s okay! It’s not about doing less; it’s about doing what’s manageable.

If exercising for 30 minutes is too much right now, start with 10. Or 5. Or even 1! What matters is that you’re doing something, and every little bit counts.

The goal is to build momentum, not to achieve perfection right out of the gate. Remember, small wins lead to big changes over time!

Conclusion

Habits shape the course of our lives in ways both big and small. Whether you want to establish a new habit, like exercising regularly or reading more, or break an old one, like mindlessly scrolling social media or eating junk food late at night, the key is recognizing that change doesn’t happen overnight. 

It’s a journey, not a sprint.

And yes, there will be setbacks. You’ll slip, fall, and feel like you’ve lost your way. But that’s okay. Success is not the absence of failure, it’s the courage to continue in spite of it. You’re not aiming for perfection, but for persistence.

Every time you get back up, you’re strengthening your resilience, building your resolve, and moving closer to lasting change.

Stay consistent, stay patient, and most importantly, believe in your ability to change. Because you can, and you will. The future you deserve is waiting—it’s time to go get it.